PANFILO'S NEW SHOES: IF THE CALCOS DON'T FIT...

By Juan Montoya
It was a still early Friday evening and Panfilo thought about getting together with la raza at El Mante Bar.
El Mante was their usual watering hole. Not only did a lot of babes go dance and hang out there, but there was usually live music by a local conjunto and you could play a competitive game of pool with a wicked gang of hustlers who preyed on the unwary.
Besides, Moi, the owner, still sold cold beer at $1.50, one of the few remaining places where you could get one that cheap.
But Panfilo had a problem. His dress shoes had seen their better days and the front part of the sole had completely come off the from the leather upper of the right-foot shoe.
He thought about it and decided to stop at the Texas Thrift Store in front of the Walmart at Boca Chica to see if he could find a pair. As he walked down Old Prt Isabel Road, he became aware of the slapping sound made by the loose sole and cut across the Walmart parking lot to avoid pedestrians coming from the opposite direction on the sidewalk.
He walked into the thrift store and looked over the selection. There wasn't much to see. He was a size 8 1/2 and it appeared that most of the used shoes were from up north where people apparently seemed to wear bigger sizes.
Finally, he settled on a pair that were about a size bigger, but he also bought a pair of thick black socks to disguise the fact that they fit a little loose. He tried the pair and they felt OK, so he left them on, paid for them at the counter, and tossed his old pair in teh dumpster behind the store.
Fourteenth Street was a few blocks from the thrift store and he ambled over, trying to get used to his new shoes. The not only felt good, Panfilo thought, they also looked good, better than the old pair.
When he got to El Mante, all his buddies were there. It was still too early for the night crowd and they made a space for him around the wooden cable spool Moi used as bar tables.
"Hey, bro, traes calcos nuevos ? Quien pompo?" asked Raul, one of his friends, He was one of the few who still used the chuco jargon for shoes.
"Simon, carnal," Panfilo replied signalling one of the bar waitresses for a cold Natural. That was one of the good things about Moi's place. A Natural Light cost only $1.
The girl came over and brought his beer.
He sat there drinking and joking with his camaradas and was about to signal for another brew when the waitress came over and brought him one. He looked at her inquiringly and was about to pull out his dollar when she told him someone had bought him the beer.
"Fue aquella chava," she said pointing at a good looking, well-dressed woman sitting at a table with some friends across the pool table next to the wall.
"Ya pegaste, ese," said Arnulfo with a slight trace of envy in his voice. "Ta bien guena."
Panfilo acknowledged the beer and nodded in her direction wondering what he had done that had attracted her attention. A few minutes later, the waitress brought another beer.
"De la misma chava," she said. "Quiere contigo. No se porque, pero quiere."
The rest of the party at the table teased him and he got up and walked over to the table to thank her personally.
"Gracias, mi amor," he said in his best galan voice as he put his hand on the back of her chair. "Como te llamas?"
"Maria," she answered. "Nice shoes. What's yours?"
"Phil," he said. "Thanks, but well, they're a  little tight," he answered feeling a little self conscious, "Son Florsheim's."
"Bailas?" she asked as the conjunto started up again.
He said yes and they danced and he returned to his table.
The waitress came by again and told him that Maria wanted a word with him.
By now, he had become the item of conversation at the table. He ambled over and she asked him if he wanted to go somewhere. "Ya sabes pa que," she said coyly.
Panfilo was thrown for a loop. To be honest, although all the friends at the table boasted of their conquests with the babes and imagined sexual exploits, it was a rarity for a woman to come on to them. When and if it happened, it was usually toward the wee hours when the effects of the alcohol made them throw their inhibitions to the wind.
Panfilo and Maria left Moi's and she told him to drive her car to a motel on Boca Chica.
Less than half an hour later Panfilo came back by himself. Maria had dropped him off in front of Moi's and took off in her new car.
"Ya?" Raul asked. "Que paso?"
"We went to the motel in her car and she paid," Panfilo said leaning back luxuriously. "Then we made love and came back."
"She paid?" Raul asked incredulously.
"Yeah," replied Panfilo. "And she even gave me $50."
"She gave you $50!" Arnulfo almost yelled. "Why?"
"I don't know," Panfilo said signalling for another Natural Light. "She told me to get a new pair of shoes my size so that I won't go around fooling people."