WILL IT BE GARCIA'S COATTAILS THAT WILL HELP CASCOS?

(There is probably no one in Cameron County who has had his hand on the political pulse longer than blogger Jerry McHale. One of his alter personalities is the good doctor G.F. McHale-Scully. The following was penned by Jerry and we warn those with more sensitive constitutions that some of his opinions are colorful, if not downright ripe. Read at your own risk.)

By Dr. G.F. McHale-Scully
There are thousands of Democrats repulsed by the Cameron County Democratic Party. Just like the priests who expect the faithful to attend mass out of tradition, local politicians expect the electorate to vote the straight ticket.

But perverted priests and prevaricating politicians have cost both institutions dearly.

The latest South Texas Independent Journalists Association (STIJA) poll has Republican incumbent Carlos Cascos leading Democrat Joe Rivera, 51% to 49%, for Cameron County Judge. Magallanes, once rated a prohibitive favorite, is clinging to a 52% to 48% lead against Oscar X. Garcia in their race for the 357th.

(Ed.s' Note: Garcia's polls, however, show him leading Magallanes by double digits and Rivera and Cascos virtually neck to neck. See graphic.) 

"If Rivera and Magallanes lose, they can blame Gilberto Hinojosa, Conrado Cantu, Abel Limas, Armando Villalobos and Jim Solis among scores of other corrupt and rotten Democrats for their demise," offered STIJA President Anthony Starr.

"Like Hinojosa, those who aren't in jail should be sharing cells with the latter four. Merely mentioning Tony Martinez, Eddie Trevino and the twits David and Daniel Sanchez, and the Tea Party suddenly looms as a credible alternative."

With the incarceration and intimidation of the politiqueras, the Democrats have lost their fifth column. They were not only effective with the mail-ins and the walk-ins, but they were effective at convincing their ignorant followers to pull la palanca.

Is there such an engine called the Democratic machine? While it is obvious that neither Rivera nor Magallanes wants to appear in the same photo as Hinojosa--he may have fooled the gringos at the state level by greasing their hands, but he isn't fooling anyone in South Texas who know that behind that monte flicks a rattler's tongue--they haven't appeared in pictures with the likes of the Lucios or Rene Oliveira for starters. Is there no party unity, no party energy, no party enthusiasm?

The voters look at the Cameron County Republicans as viable options. If the party of the rich, racists and religious right ran Terry Ray or Bud Richards or Harry McNair, the Democrats would prevail in landslides, but Tony Garza, Cascos and Garcia aren't reactionary ideologues, born-again Christians or prudes.

They like to fuck and drink. They are reasonable individuals who aren't ranting and raving that Barack Obama is a goddamn nigger who is bringing the world to an end. They aren't wasting any rhetoric opposing gay marriage, abortion or legalizing marijuana.

Besides being Mexican-Americans themselves, they are attractive to the South Texas populace because they share similar roots. They were once Democrats too until the party proved too corrupt and incompetent for their principles.