Monday, January 24, 2022

HOW TO CONVINCE YOUR FRIENDS TO VOTE IN NEXT ELECTION

La Cebolla

1. “But our government officials worked so hard on gerrymandering.”
Politicians like Texas Gov. Greg Abbott have worked for decades to rig the system. The least citizens can do is vote so that our corrupt system can operate the way it was designed to.

2. “Really? All you need is to have an ID, be an American citizen, not have a felony on your record, be 18 or over, and be free during limited hours on a specific Tuesday in November.”
Sometimes it helps to simply remind people how easy it is to vote.

3. “Same.”
It feels good to finally admit it.

4“This is a good start, but you need to convince your friends not to vote as well.”
Careful, now, you don’t want to get greedy.

5. “Fine, more votes for me.”
They may vote just to keep you from having a lot of something.

6. “You can trade your vote in for favors at a later date.”
They just have to remind the candidate once they’re in office that they are owed a filled-in pothole or two, and it’s done.

7. “They have bags of Takis at the polling place.”
Specify that it’s good flavors, too, like lemon and chile.

8. “But if the politiqueras and candidates can't entice you to vote, what are they going to do with all those chicken plates?
Plead for the jobs of workers and future of the local Lopez Supermarkets, both of  which will probably go broke.

9. “I guess I’ll just go tell Lady Liberty that democracy is over.”
The sound of the Statue of Liberty weeping is enough to soften the hardest heart.

10. “But think of all the soldiers who died so that a certain subset of Americans could always enjoy this right!”
This will definitely help motivate them to vote, provided they are part of that certain subset of Americans.

14 comments:

Anonymous said...

Biden Would Like to Know What Your Problem Is

Orale hillbilly coco wanna be white tell him since you seem to have a hard-on for the President. Pinche pendejo gringo/coco.

Anonymous said...

Abbott WILL win re-election in November... this message is for all the WHINY ASS MEXICANS in the RGV!

Anonymous said...

January 24, 2022 at 9:56 AM

YOur experience and record electing pendejos is unblemished two for two, stupid racist republicans will never learn, until Russia is on your door steps... MORONS

THIS MESSAGES IS FOR ALL RED-ASS RACIST REPUBLICANS!!!!!

Anonymous said...

VIVA BOB (BETO)!

Anonymous said...

more like subspecies, racist republicans idiotas

Anonymous said...

They have bags of Takis at the polling places lol, them taste good.

Anonymous said...

What has voting Demorats gotten this city and county? Let's see. Just a bunch of corrupt money hungry politicians. The same ones that this idiot blogger writes about. And campaigns for. Why not vote Republican this time around? We can't be any worse off than we are now. And if you don't like it or don't see any improvements vote for your ratas again. I dont mind voting voting either side. But F FRANCIS O'ROURKE. CHINGA TU MOTHER.

Anonymous said...

VIVA BETO (BOB)!

Anonymous said...

The only gimmie that works here is the frijoles plate used to be called chicken plate before the pendejomic

Anonymous said...

January 24, 2022 at 12:59 PM

I see now that racist red-ass republicans don't like their mothers typical ass holes. Big reason not to vote racist republican EVER. GUEYONES.

Anonymous said...

January 24, 2022 at 12:59 PM

Don't tread on your mommy pendejo. “Excuse me? Excuse me? Mommy? Sorry. Mommy? Sorry. Mommy? Sorry. Mommy? Sorry. Mommy?”

Sorry mommy your ass idiota do not insult your monny guey

Anonymous said...

Don't talk bad about mothers estupido, you too have one or you came out of a chicken egg?

Anonymous said...

January 24, 2022 at 12:59 PM
Most important the right NOT to be governed by a bunch of hoodlum red-ass racist republicans for ONE...

Anonymous said...

By the way why don't he mention his meskin wife? donde esta la migra? Do those gringos on TV know that he's married to a meskin and they are funding da wall? Does his boss trump know that?

rita